Lucy Beaumont shared the tale of her ill-fated teenage trip to Newquay and it’s a fabulously funny story in four parts
You might have seen this week how Kirstie Allsop was reported to social services after allowing her 15-year-old son to go inter railing.
The details need not bother us here – it’s fair to say she wasn’t happy about it – but we mention it because it prompted the great Lucy Beaumont (check out her tour dates and tickets here) to share the tale of what happened to her when she was 15.
It’s a fabulous short story told in just four parts and it might just be the funniest minute or so you spend today.
1.
The Kirsty Allsopp saga is reminding me of when me and my mates at 15 wanted to meet surfers but got Newquay and Torquay mixed up and went on a mid-week coach trip, we just couldn’t understand why there was no-one in the whole town under 75; the landlady of the B&B rang all our
— Lucy Beaumont (@LucyABeaumont) August 27, 2024
2.
Mams and told them she’d make sure we’d pay for lying to them about leaving home, she gave us a curfew and would wait for us in her nightie, somehow we managed to smuggle the ‘England cricket team’ back, a group of older lads who we thought were ‘pros’ because simply they
— Lucy Beaumont (@LucyABeaumont) August 27, 2024
3.
Didn’t have a northern accent and we hadn’t met anyone that said ‘bath’ like the queen before. She had a pool at the hotel but it was drained and about 14 degrees but we sat around it in bikinis anyway working out how to buy fags because she’d taken our money off us.
— Lucy Beaumont (@LucyABeaumont) August 27, 2024
4.
She knew everyone in town, who were also watching us. The lowest point was sat hiding behind a windmill in a model village in the rain with a can of Stella and a benson and hedges.
— Lucy Beaumont (@LucyABeaumont) August 27, 2024
And it prompted no end of responses from people sharing their thoughts about what happened (both to her and to Kirstie Allsop) and sharing tales of when they did something similar.
1.
Sounds a bit like our bunking school for a teenage mid week trip to Bognor Regis Butlins in the 80s. It didn’t live up to expectation.
— Sarah sticking with the truth (@sarah_owl3) August 27, 2024
2.
I’d left home, bought my first property and my Dad used to phone to make sure I was home by 10.30! I can just hear him if I’d suggested I was off interailing at 15 .
— Jo Smith (@rugs_bunny) August 27, 2024
3.
A pal and I hitched from Donny to Mablethorpe when we were 15 (mid 70s) to try to capture the Quadrophenia experience. Hitching a ride back on a milk float at 5am in the wilds of Lincs didn’t exactly fulfil the dream it has to be said.
— Ken Cunningham (@KenCunn55085606) August 27, 2024
4.
Yep, me and three friends stayed in a static caravan in Wales, met a guy who snorted a Rennie, and we all got really bad sunburn – the week after I was a bridesmaid with hideous tan lines. Less rite of passage, more shite of passage. https://t.co/iSRwuEL5AB
— Beth Morrey (@BethMorrey) August 28, 2024
5.
Amazing story thank you laughed so hard can picture it all. That little old lady really protected you guys and I bet you hated her
— bracelet of bright hair (@elsetherby) August 27, 2024
6.
I went to a Blues v Villa derby game on my own, at blues when I was 15. Believe me I was ready for anything life threw at me after that
— Darren (@_stonyd) August 27, 2024
7.
Me and my friend (also called Katie) went on a Highland Hop aged 15. Trip to Pitlochry with no one under the age of 70. Not what we expected but nevertheless we had fun – looking back probably more than we would have had with people our own age
— Katie Flanagan (@katiemcflanagan) August 27, 2024
8.
This is a great thread and even better if you can imagine Lucy Beaumont saying it aloud. https://t.co/cYRaCNDqzl
— Andrew Connell (@andrewpconnell) August 27, 2024
